Bad weather makes for bad conditions, which makes for bad climbing, which makes for bad blogging. This is why I have been too lazy to update. I apologise that I have taken out my rage by denying you, the reader, these short, sweet, humourous, and well written updates in my life.

After spending a few days in Belgium, in order to service the trusty chariot, and to pick Sara up I returned to font thinking that after a few days of rest I would be like an enraged Bruce Banner. Unfortunately fate would have a different plan in store. The weather had been bad so things were looking a bit wet at most crags, so we opted to go to Cul de Chien and 91.1. I wasn’t too fussed about trying something hard and wanted to make sure that Sara got some climbing done. I was impressed to find that 91.1 was almost completely dry and there were a whole heap of people there. I’d never climbed there before, because I’m elitist, and there is nothing hard up there but I was impressed by some of the lines. Sara and I got started doing some warm up problems and then we moved on to the red circuit. She crushed some slabs, showed great persistence on a particular arete, and then topped it off with an incredible ascent of Le Cure Dents, 6A. It’s a highball wall/arete with a slopey topout and I was very glad when Sara finally rolled over the top. For a few seconds I actually thought she was going to roll off backwards! After she was finished we went down to l’autre toit and I was a bit disappointed to find the entire roof wet. A lot of the holds were dry enough to climb, but the roof was covered in a layer of moistness so the footholds were wet and soon enough the handholds were turning dark. I did all the moves on The Maxx, 7C+, and thought I’d be able to do it quickly but I guess the moistness of the holds only got worse and I had to give up. I think when I do go back and crush it into oblivion I might claim 8A because it’s pretty hard (unless I find out that I was doing it incorrectly and there is an easier sequence). I’m not impartial to upgrading problems. Only dickheads downgrade and never upgrade. I don’t wish to be a dickhead. We left with me feeling a bit pissed because I wanted to do the Maxx but I was too weak to do it in bad conditions. Cry me a river.

Saturday we went to Cuisiniere earlyish to find the car park totally empty! I even double checked it was Saturday because I couldn’t believe we were the first people there at 10am. In all likelihood it was because most people had decided it would be too damp but I was eager and foolish. We got up there and things looked a rather wet shade of green but I figured a bit of chalk would dry the holds on Karma and I’d be alright. I warmed up on some red problems, then some 7′s, but when I got to Karma I just had to BOOST! I felt weak, lackadaisical, and rather jaded. Eventually I felt a bit better and got my right hand to the crimp a couple of tries but it was just too damp to have a serious effort. We left with me feeling like a total failure and a complete under achiever. Sara assured me it wasn’t so, but girls are all sugar aren’t they.

Sunday we were determined to find dry rock! Rocher de la Reine/Petite Reine was the choice venue but upon arrival at Petite Reine I found that my luck was still running low. Papillon, 8A, had chalk on (from the previous day) but I soon realised it was deceptive. I could only do 1 move at a time, and then as soon as I’d let go/fall off/slide off/grease off my hands were green and the rock was black. It just wasn’t happening and I gave up with a deep feeling of dissatisfaction. We trekked over to Rocher de la Reine and the place was busy with people, bathing in glorious sunshine, climbing on completely dry rock. On top of the crag there is a long ridge and from it there is such a nice vista (only spoiled by the sound of the motorway!) so I was happy to be basking in sunshine again. Sara got busy ticking problems and I went to seek out Makhnovtchina, 7C. It’s a crazy roof feature but from the chalk that was there, and the description I was sure it started from the obvious place. How wrong I was. I climbed it from the obvious sit start, thinking it might be possible to start lower, but ridiculous because it would be too hard to keep your bum off the ground. Turns out I climbed a 7B called Voyage au Centre de la Terre, and the 7C did start somewhere deep in the recesses of the cave. The moves look cool but the ground is way too close for it to be great. At least I was finally climbing on dry rock! After this I went to find Sara and spotted her on some 6′s. The day ended with a nice sunset, but a sad goodbye.

Today there was rain, and it shall be the same tomorrow. Hopefully I’ll find dry rock again soon. I miss it deeply.